Fox Business Channel

Tarzan Meets Bambi

Fox Business Channel, in its long-awaited debut, launched its new post-trading show called Happy Hour.

For those who missed the show, it is set in a New York bar and hosted by Cody Willard, a Wall Street investor with a Johnny Weissmuller haircut but without the physique, and Bambi, a well-endowed actress on loan from a small San Fernando Valley film company. When asked why she took the Fox anchor position, Bambi responded: "It was the first job offer I ever got that did not require taking an AIDS test."

This blogger has since learned that John Holmes and Tracy Lords will be hosting tomorrow's show.

Soon after the launching of the show, it was said that the ground above long-time Wall Street Journal editor Robert Bartlett moved as he was rolling over in his grave. This blogger was also informed from a well-connected source at Craigslist that the job-placement website got a record number of hits as jounalists for the Journal sought to find new employment following the shows' debute.

A lawyer, who negotiated the terms and conditions of Rupert Murdoch's acquisiton of Dow Jones, said the parties negotiated every possible detail ensuring the editorial integrity of the Journal. Even prohibiting the global-media magnate from posting a Page 3 Girl in the 100-plus-year-old business paper.

However, it has since been learned that Murdoch found an out in the contract that will allow him to post the Page 3 Girl on the cover of the newspaper. It is our understanding that the first girl to grace the cover of the Journal will be Bambi, the host of today's Happy Hour. And on her breast will be written: "Fox: America's Business Channel." And yes, her endowment is such that it will be able to display the entire slogan.

As a final note, the Tarzan & Bambi hour followed an interview with Alan Greenspan.